It’s March 8. Happy International Women’s Day! In honor of such a fine day, I thought I would talk about something that has been in my heart and mind. 

For centuries girls have been taught to think that the opinions of every guy matters. If there is no boy in our lives giving us the attention we think we deserve, then there is clearly something wrong with us. This statement couldn’t be further from the truth.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, as a girl. You do not need a boy to complete you. You don’t need another human being to complete you for that matter. Whether there is a boy at your side does not define you. It does not make you any less beautiful. It doesn’t make you any less desirable. Your worth is not measured by a boy’s (or boys) standards.

If there is a boy at your side, way to go. I wish your relationship well. May it prosper. If there is none at your side, I would reply with the “no worries, there is someone for everyone” buuut that will leave you in desperation, hoping for that someone to come as soon as possible. How do I know this? I’ve experienced it. 

Do not always run to the arms of the first boy to give you attention. Some boys just want you. Always get to know the guy first. Become friends. See how things play out. Make sure you are being treated with honor and respect. Also, treat him with honor and respect. Most importantly, make sure they do not have a girlfriend or have intentions of getting with someone else. And if you happen to stumble upon someone who wants to get to know every inch of who you are, great. 

I repeat myself though, boys don’t give you worth. Also for any boy that is reading this: Choose the girl wisely as well. But having a girl by your side does not define you either.

We do not define each other. You are not defined by me, nor am I defined by you. People can influence us and shape us but they do not define us. We are not the failures of past relationships, the mistakes we’ve made, or the mistakes of others.

Girls, the beauty of some other girl is not the absence of yours, and neither do you lack in any area someone else does. Just because the guy you liked chose the other girl does not mean you aren’t worth having someone, or pretty enough, or special enough. Consider the opposite. You are more than enough. You are so beautiful and radiant, they can’t handle it. They are truly missing out on the precious soul that you are. The timing of the relationship is also important, but that’s another story…

It took a lot for me to finally get it through my head that I needed to just focus on myself. I needed to learn to love myself. I think the whole statement of “No one can love you if you don’t love yourself” is partly false. People can really love you regardless of you not loving yourself. It’s just they can’t love all of you because you hide all the parts that you don’t like or want others to see, so they can’t fully love you for you. So I say, learn to love every single inch of yourself. You are incredible. Love the inner you just as much as you love the outer you. If you are one to always take care of your hair, face, or appearance in general, then take care of your soul and mind just the same. Nurture it. Feed it with all things beautiful and good. Don’t allow any negative thoughts to consume who you are. Don’t believe the lies others feed to you. Take the positive good comments. Engrave the in your heart. Let go of the negative comments. Be someone you are proud of. Be someone that turns the other cheek. That no one can knock down. You are so strong. You have gotten this far. Keep going. Don’t stop now. The way you handle any challenge given to you is what defines you. 

As girls, we are so freaking special, the gave us our own day. Be proud of who you are. Be grateful for the body you are in. Be grateful for the influential women in history. They learned to move past the opinions of others so much so that they went out to achieve their goals. Don’t let anyone keep you from achieving your goals. Go and influence those around you. You were uniquely created. What do you think would happen if you didn’t exist? The world would be very different without you. Appreciate your life. You are a priceless work of art.