“And He said to me, ‘My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.’ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.“ [2 Corinthians 12:9]

“We are surrounded by a great cloud of people whose lives tell us what faith means. So let us run the race that is before us and never give up. We should remove from our lives anything that would get in the way and the sin that so easily holds us back. Let us look only to Jesus, the One who began our faith and who makes it perfect. He suffered death on the cross. But he accepted the shame as if it were nothing because of the joy that God put before him. And now he is sitting at the right side of God’s throne. Think about Jesus’ example. He held on while wicked people were doing evil things to him. So do not get tired and stop trying.” [Hebrews 12:1-3]

Yesterday was about letting go of the shame my imperfect past brings. Obviously, I’m still not going to be perfect in my present of future, but God’s grace conceals those imperfections. Every single morning, I get a fresh start. The bible says His mercies begin fresh each morning. The future holds so much. I have to let go of my past. I have to keep moving forward. God wants me to focus on the now and what is to come. He doesn’t want me spending all my energy on what once was. Just as God has given me grace, I must give it to others.

There has been quite a few people who have hurt me in the past. People are still going to end up hurting me. I must learn to show them the grace I have been given. What they have done and will do to hurt me isn’t okay, but I shouldn’t let it hurt me. I must forgive even if they never say sorry. I must freely give grace. That is how God’s grace is. It’s not okay we hurt God, but He has given us grace to learn not to hurt Him like that again. Unfortunately, we sometimes abuse that grace and continue to hurt God. Fortunately, God loves us unconditionally, but that doesn’t make it okay to carry on the way we used to. But as the verse says, God’s power works best in my weakness. God makes me strong and victorious when I am weak and failing to overcome my trials.

The shame, hurt, anger, resentment, bitterness, and anything else of that sort holds me back from fully accepting and giving grace. These aren’t appropriate for the race the aforementioned verses say we are running. There’s a lot more distractions that keep us from doing our best in this race. We tend to think that things we can’t seem to let go of are what defines us, but they don’t. It’s hard to accept that we are good enough for God. That God wants us just the way we are. He doesn’t want us to hide behind the shame or hurt or anything else. He wants us vulnerable and willing to sacrifice everything like He has done for us. Our fear and pride get the best of us. Jesus wants us to take heart. He has overcome the world. Victory is all His and there is no reason to be afraid of the outcome. It’s not easy, but it’s the best decision I’ll ever make. I can’t let my imperfections keep me from trying my best at this race. God will acknowledge and reward my efforts.

There are still areas filled with anger that need to be removed. I need to fully forgive those who hurt me. You are my Healer. Only You can take this broken heart and mend it. This anger and impatience is keeping me from fulling running this race. The are other habits that need to be broken. They keep me from getting even closer to You. Sometimes they make me feel farther from You, but that’s because I let that happen. If only I wasn’t so afraid to speak my mind and pour my heart out in these areas. If only I wasn’t so afraid of certain people. There’s no reason to be afraid of them. That fear of losing them must leave me. If I lose them, well that’s fine. I have to let things and people go. These people I fear aren’t gods. Why do I give them such power and positions in my life? I have to let it all go. I need to be okay with letting parts of me go. I need to be okay with You removing everything that doesn’t align with Your plan. I have to obey You. You are the only thing that matters. I can’t afford to lose You or leave You out of my life. If that happens, then I will truly be lost. I want to be free. I want to be found in You. I need to trust You wholeheartedly.